Someone Ruined Xmas, It Was Me

I committed the cardinal sin, I looked at my Christmas presents before Christmas. In my defense I didn’t do it alone. And in my defense my mom put all the presents out under the tree ahead of time.

A couple of days before Christmas, my parents went out. My brother and I held our breath waiting to hear the car go down the drive. We waited ten seconds and bee-lined it for the tree. Ever so carefully we extracted the tape one by one off each present just enough to peek at what was inside. Then with the precision of surgeons we closed them up and placed them back in the pile.

The days leading up to Christmas my brother and I had a secret that bonded us. But the thrill of sneaking around faded fast and left only a sunken feeling. All those carefully re-wrapped presents seamed like empty boxes. Come Christmas morning, I worried that I wasn’t going to be able to perform my happy, grateful and surprised faces. But I rallied for the sake of my hard-working parents. I didn’t want to disappoint them.

I love that I just make the Millennial cut. Millennials are innovative, creative, daring, and can handle change really well. But one attribute that I have to fight as a Millennial is not being able to wait. I want it now. Just like the presents I prematurely opened. I don’t want to wait for my dreams. There is the practical side of me that says, “Work for it! It will come in time as you work hard.” Then there is the Millennial side that says, “Really! Why hasn’t this happened yet?! Don’t they know who I am!”

I have found that I have asked God this question over and over the past fifteen years (now it’s a bit embarrassing to admit). Typing it out makes me see the entitlement written all over it. I feel like Jekyll and Hyde as I learn to trust God and hustle towards my dreams. One moment I see the wisdom of waiting and the next, I’m once again tearing through those presents.

I know I don’t want to achieve my dreams before the right time. I want my character to be at the place where it can handle the responsibilities of carrying my dreams. Character can make or break our dreams.

What dreams are you waiting for? Know that you are not alone in your struggle to wait. Yes, waiting stinks. But, in the waiting, work hard, gain wisdom, and you will build character. Your time will come.

Always Growing,
Marcy

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